I am not a successful blogger. I say that because I’m pretty sure my dad is the only one following me. Hi Dad. Oh and Ironman, who doesn’t so much follow me as get forced to read every post before it’s published, which is usually in the middle of the night when he gets up to use the restroom and can’t fall back asleep. So, a follower and an insomniac. But I assure you, I’ve read several articles on how to be a successful blogger, so I know my stuff. And I think I know what my followers would ask me if I had any.
1. Why don’t you have any eye-grabbing images?
If I give my fans everything up front, I won’t be able to dazzle you later. (The truth – the Littles haven’t granted me the time to upload my creative shots yet)
2. Why don’t you have giveaways?
See the introduction to this post. I don’t have any followers. If companies give me free stuff, I keep it.
3. At the end of your posts, why don’t you ask a thought-provoking question?
If you’re anything like me you have to make 1,000 decisions daily and one more question might throw you over the edge. I’m just looking out for you. You’re welcome.
4. Some of your posts seem short.
This is not a question. This is a statement, but since this is a totally fictitious interview, I’ll go ahead and answer. Or respond. To keep readers engaged you should keep your posts around 400 – 600 words. Also, my former boss (we’ll call him Undercover Boss for anonymity) used to call me out on my somewhat verbose emails. I suppose I could have been more succinct in my point making. So you can thank him. If you knew who he was.
5. Why don’t you have any social media accounts for this blog?
See #1. And a confession. Most of the time I write this blog one handed on my phone while someone drools on it or is trying to drive a truck up my arm. As I write this, however, I realize I actually could use a new friend or two, even if they are virtual. Check back for an update on a
cry for help social media fan page for this blog.
Oh, and thanks for reading. Dad.